The number one lesson is to distinguish a data dump from a well-told story.
Stories are not lists, decks, Power-Points, flip charts, lectures, instructions, regulations, manifestos, calculations, lesson plans, threats, statistics, evidence, orders, or raw facts.
Non-stories may provide information, but stories have a unique power to move people’s hearts, minds, feet, and wallets in the story teller’s intended direction.
To succeed, you have to persuade others to support your vision, dream, or cause.
First … get your listeners’ attention with an unexpected challenge or question.
Next … give your listeners an emotional experience by narrating the struggle to overcome that challenge or to find the answer to the opening question.
Finally … galvanize your listeners’ response with an eye-opening resolution that calls them to action.
Narrative emerges from violations to expectations. Compelling drama convinces listeners that the teller has Heart. Successful stories turn “me” to “we”—align your interests!
Ignite empathy in the room and face-to-face, and your audience won’t just hear you, they’ll feel you!
Negative backstories can be just that. They can limit beliefs and sabotage expectations. Mentally create a new context and new meaning that breaks the pattern of the negative story.
If the lion does not tell his story, the hunter will. Don’t let the herd decide what is heard.
Those who do not have power over the story that dominates their lives, the power to retell it, rethink it, deconstruct it, joke about it, and change it as times change, truly are powerless, because they cannot think new thoughts. Once you lose control of your own story, you’ll need double the muscle to get that power back. – Salman Rushdie
If you don’t have a story, you don’t have a business. The promise of the story has to be real otherwise, it doesn’t deliver. Jackie Kennedy’s imitation pearls still net millions even though they’re fake – it’s because there is a good story behind them.
You need to develop trust. And only if they respect your motives and empathize with you as a fellow human being will they feel that trust.
Good storytellers are also great listeners. Boredom occurs when you fail to make the other person interesting. Find out what interests them. Understand their prejudices. Understand their optimal context.
Who is your hero? Your hero is the character is that your listeners will identify with. Simply stated, your hero is the person, place, product, or brand that enables your audience to feel the change your story promises.
On putting out fires and solving people’s problems: “Let me tell you a story. Don’t be confused. You’re only renting that office. You don’t own it. It’s a zoo. You’re the zookeeper, and every single person that comes in the office comes with a monkey. That monkey is their problem. They’re trying to leave it with you. Your job is to discover where the monkey is. They’ll hide it, or dress it up, but remember you’re the zookeeper. You’ve got to keep the place clean. So make sure when you walk them to the door, they’ve got their monkey by the hand. Don’t let them leave without it. Don’t let them come back until it’s trained and they have solutions to their problem. Otherwise, at the end of the day, you’ll have an office full of screaming, jumping animals and monkey shit all over the floor.” – Jack Warner
Getting in “state” isn’t just a mental, emotional, or physical process; it’s all three. It involves focusing your whole being on your intent to achieve your purpose – actors have to get into “state” before they perform just like athletes do.
The trick is to find something about the product or service that excites you, even if it’s something as small as the color of the item or the look of the service’s website. Then focus on the aspect of your story that makes you feel genuinely enthusiastic. – avoid energy suckers who convey a lack of energy by their posture, body language, and tone. Stand up straight and look people in the eye instead.
You have to be all in on your story, or else it won’t come off as authentic. “We can either laugh together or we can cry together.”
Listening like a hawk (like Tony Robbins) is a form of active listening that engages people to tell their story.
Face time is more valuable than telepresence because you can build bonds with people. Micro expressions help to form those bonds. You are more engaged with your audience. Don’t rely on state of the art technologies like Skype.